Bride of Project Horror!

10/01/2012

SCENE (HOLWERDA MANOR): We fade in to the interior of a dark, long-abandoned manor.  The furniture is concealed by dustcloths.  In the corner stands a grandfather clock, its hands stopped at 12.  Nothing moves inside, but a storm rages on the other side of windows that are streaked with years of filth.  Through a doorway a flashlight's beam appears, blinding us momentarily before we see that it is held by a teenaged boy, who is accompanied by his timid girlfriend.

"I don't know, Johnny... I'm scared.  We shouldn't be here!"
"Trust me, babe.  We're fine and, besides, do you really want to go back out in that storm?"
"No, I suppose not.  But... but this is Holwerda Manor!  They say-"
"I know what they say, Susie.  That's just old stories.  Don't worry about that.  Our parents don't expect us home for hours, and we've got this place all to ourselves."
"Oh, Johnny, not now!  Do you think this is the room where Old Man Holwerda did it?"
"How would I know?  What does it even matter?"
"Because it's October first!  They say that every year on the first, her spirit rises back up through the floorboards of the house and holds anybody who she finds in the house as her captive for the entire month!"
"You're really frightened, aren't you?  Look, I'm not going to let anything happen to you, OK?  Come here..."

Johnny enfolds Susie in his arms, gently pushes wet hair back from her face, and kisses her.  She resists at first, still uneasy at their surroundings, but gradually becomes more passionate.  Their eyes closed, they do not see what we do, which is a sickly light appearing from beneath the floorboards in front of the grandfather clock.  The light grows stronger, becoming a foul shade of yellow, until it fades to reveal another figure in the room.  She wears a wedding dress and veil, both of which have taken on a dull grey hue.  We see nothing of her face through the veil, save for two glowing yellow unnaturally large eyes.  She speaks...

"WHO INTRUDES ON MY HOUSE ON THIS, MY ANNIVERSARY?"
"Oh my God!  It's her, Johnny!  It's HER!"
"Who?  WHO?"
"I AM THE BRIDE OF PROJECT HORROR, AND YOU ARE MINE FOR THE NEXT 31 DAYS!"
"Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo..."
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 Whoa!  Are you as scared as I am, after reading that masterful work of horror fiction?
Alright, folks, this is the third year in a row, so you know the drill by now.  Project Horror.  31 days, 31 movies, none that I've seen before.

This year's themes will be:
  • October 1-5:  The Price is Right (In which we celebrate the works of Vincent Price)
  • October 6-10:  Cults & The Occult
  • October 11-15:  Cannibals, Zombies, and Nazis (Oh My!) 
  • October 16-20:  Directors Showcase (In which I will be watching movies by directors whose other work I have enjoyed) 
  • October 21-25:  Off the Deep End (In which we will be watching some truly depraved things)
  • October 26-30:  Trippy & Surreal 
  • October 31 (HALLOWEEN!):  Danny's Choice
It starts tonight, so brace yourself!
Also, the comments on my blog are all messed up, and appear to have eaten all of my previous comments.  Don't worry - they're still out there, I'm just trying to get them to show up again.   I'm not entirely sure how they'll act if you post new comments, but don't let that stop you.  I hope to have them fixed very, very soon.

2 comments:

Meredith Bray said...

I read it as "Cannibis, Zombies, and Nazis." Upon re-reading, not sure if I'm disappointed or excited. Glad you're back!

Ali said...

I'm always one for being supportive... but, man... that screenplay... um... sucked. ;)

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