All Saints Day: A Look Back at Bride of Project Horror

11/01/2012

When I reach the end of a viewing project and look back, I'm always surprised at how long ago it feels since I watched some of the movies on the list.  A month of movies adds up!  Here, for the interested, is a final scorecard of the month's movies (all ratings are on a 5-point scale):
Date
Block
Title
Rating
10/1The Price Is RightThe Masque of the Red Death
5
10/2The Price Is RightFrom a Whisper to a Scream
2
10/3The Price Is RightMadhouse
3
10/4The Price Is RightHouse on Haunted Hill
3
10/5The Price Is RightTales of Terror
4
10/6Cults & OccultMartha Marcy May Marlene
5
10/7Cults & OccultThe Last Exorcism
4
10/8Cults & OccultTo the Devil a Daughter
5
10/9Cults & OccultSeason of the Witch
4
10/10Cults & OccultParanormal Activity 2
3
10/11Cannibals, Zombies, and Nazis (Oh My!)Jungle Holocaust
1
10/12C,Z,&N (Oh My!)Cannibal Ferox
3
10/13C,Z,&N (Oh My!)Demons
5
10/14C,Z,&N (Oh My!)The Keep
3
10/15C,Z,&N (Oh My!)Blood Creek
2
10/16Directors ShowcaseThe Brood
5
10/17Directors ShowcaseBruiser
1
10/18Directors ShowcaseThe Innkeepers
5
10/19Directors ShowcaseLovely Molly
3
10/20Directors ShowcaseThree...Extremes
4
10/21Deep EndHuman Centipede 2
1
10/22Deep EndBloodsucking Freaks
3
10/23Deep EndSchramm
4
10/24Deep EndNekromantik
3
10/25Deep EndA Serbian Film
3
10/26Trippy & SurrealFear(s) of the Dark
4
10/27Trippy & SurrealBegotten
2
10/28Trippy & SurrealCarnival of Souls
4
10/29Trippy & SurrealBeyond the Black Rainbow
?
10/30Trippy & SurrealAntichrist
5
10/31Danny's ChoiceBarney's Halloween Party


By now you know that I like to look at what the numbers tell us.  The top-rated block this time, with an average score of 4.2, was Cults & Occult.  There was a tie for the lowest-rated block.  Coming in with an average score of 2.8 were the Cannibals, Zombies, and Nazis (Oh My!) and Deep End blocks.  What does this mean in terms of this year's project?  Well, I think it means that sometimes when you want a good horror movie, less is more.

I'm actually a little bit surprised at the way the numbers played out, because the reason I included some of the more extreme choices in this year's lineup was to try and see something new, something that might move the needle a little bit.  What actually happened, though, is that the old school spooks and devils ended up winning the day over the much gorier and grosser entries.

For those of you who told me that you could never watch this many horror movies, allow me to point you to this totally scientific study which proves that watching horror movies may actually help you lose weight.  So, you know, feel free to add the whole Saw franchise to your Netflix queue, and thank me when you're able to fit into those jeans in the back of your closet.  (I'm just kidding about that last part.  Please choose better movies than the Saw series.)

I haven't entirely decided whether or not I'm going to do Project Horror again next October.  By the time you add up three years of this, plus nights when I did double features, I've watched nearly 100 horror movies for the blog.  I'm afraid that I may be wearing out the novelty, and also that I'm having to reach further for movies that I haven't seen.  We'll see.  If I don't do a movie marathon, maybe I'll do something entirely different.  Actually, I think I may have thought of something already, but you'll just have to wait until next October to see!

Again, thank you to everybody who read or watched along with me, or who caught me in person to comment on the project!  Thank you to friends who made recommendations, and special thanks to Kristin for not only recommending some, but for helping me to get my hands on a few of the more obscure titles.  Thanks to her, too, for joining me for Cannibal Ferox!  And, as always, thanks to my friend Steve for the idea to do this in the first place.
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SCENE (HOLWERDA MANOR): We see the parlor where Johnny and Susie (OH YEAH!  You thought I'd forget about them, didn't you?!?) were taken captive by the Bride of Project Horror.  Although the room is still and dark, a few beams of sunlight penetrate the gloom around the edges of heavy velvet curtains.  There is a loud pounding at the door, which bursts open to allow the entry of three policemen.  Two officers walk into the room's center to look around while the third, the chief, remains concealed by shadow.
OFFICER #1:  Good lord!  What happened here?
OFFICER #2:  Is that them?  Are they the missing kids?
OFFICER #1:  They're wearing the clothes that they went missing in, but it can't be them.  Those bodies look like they've been here for ages.  Johnny and Susie only disappeared one month ago today!
Both men turn to the chief, whose back is to us as he examines a portrait above the fireplace.
OFFICER #2:  What do we do, chief?  The town is going to panic when they hear about this.
CHIEF:  (with back still turned to us) Nobody's going to panic.  Nothing happened here.
OFFICER #2:  But chief...
CHIEF:  (sternly) Nothing at all.  Now report back to the station immediately.  I'll be along soon.
The officers stare at the chief in confusion, then slowly look at each other, turn towards the door and leave.
The portrait that the chief has been looking at comes into clearer focus, and we see that it is of Old Man Holwerda and his bride.  The chief turns away from the picture, allowing us our first look at his face, AND IT'S THE SAME AS THE FACE IN THE PORTRAIT!
Yeah, good luck sleeping after that, suckers.

1 comments:

Steve Myles said...

I stole the idea from my friend Rob, but I'm glad to have helped. If you do a part 4 to the project, maybe we can figure out how to coordinate. :-)

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