Return of Project Horror, Day 26: ThanksKilling

10/26/2011

I don't know if I planned this out very well.  I probably should have started the month with campy movies, and then finished strong with some movies that would knock it out of the park.  I wanted to have my Rocky Horror Picture Show party towards the end of the project, though, which ended up setting the calendar for me.  (By the way, there's still room at the party, along with pizza and beer!  Send me a note or a comment if you'd like to join us, and I'll let you know where to come.)

So.  Here, in a nutshell, is what you need to know about ThanksKilling.
  1. Literally the very first onscreen image in the movie is a boob.  Not a topless woman, just a full screen boob.  When the camera pulls out, it is revealed that the boob belongs to a topless pilgrim lady.  Also, four of the first five lines of this movie contain at least one of the following words: tits, titties, boobs, bitch.
  2. The movie is about a turkey who kills people every 500 years, because of an Indian curse.
  3. The movie ends with the words "To be continued... IN SPACE!"
OK, so clearly this thing wasn't made to be awards bait.  It's just a few minutes longer than an hour, the special effects are ridiculously corny, and the acting is just awful.  Really, just really bad.  The only way that you could possibly be frightened by this movie would be if you are a toddler and have never seen a movie before.

That said, I also have to admit that I actually enjoyed watching this movie.  Part of that is because it was mercifully short, which was a treat this late in the month.  But also, it just doesn't pretend to be anything at all other than what it is, which is ludicrously moronic fluff.  It's got a ton of groan-inducing turkey puns and jokes ("You just got stuffed!", "I suspect fowl play!", "Gobble gobble, motherfucker!"), it's got boobies, and it's got a musical number about best friends.

How to rate this?  I did enjoy it.  I also fully recognize that it's just not a good movie at all.  I'm going to give it two roast turkeys out of five, but with the qualifier that you may actually have fun watching it under the right circumstances.
TOMORROW: The Call of Cthulhu (available on instant streaming)

4 comments:

Rachel R. said...

Hmmm...."right circumstances" = "drunk."

Danny Holwerda said...

Pop open a bottle of wine with Thanksgiving dinner, and you'll be all set to watch this while you have your pumpkin pie.

Kyle Lawrence said...

Ugh. So I actually watched this thinking "It's only an hour." Terrible! I understand why you enjoyed it, and I get that. I actually found myself enjoying it at times as well. But you're right, the acting is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO horrendous that I was constantly jolted out of any pleasure.
I think it says something when your best performance comes from a turkey puppet. In fact, the turkey was actually the best part of this movie by far. And the surreal nature of the way the characters related to the turkey was pretty funny. For instance, the scene where they turkey is wearing the sheriff's face and nobody realizes it's not actually the sheriff was probably my favorite.
Of course, that's not saying much as I hated most of the rest of the movie.

Danny Holwerda said...

Yeah, the sheriff's face scene was probably the best scene in the movie. You know, this reminds me: didn't you and I watch "Jack Frost" together, back in the day? For some reason, I just have a really strong memory of that.

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